If you’re a writer, you know what I mean. You can’t just say, The dog laid down at my feet and fell asleep. That’s boring. It tells the reader nothing about how cute the dog is, how innocent his sleep was, how you reacted to this most loyal of activities.
I’ve spent years collecting snippets on how to describe characters, create settings, describe actions that I am now going to share with you over a period of, oh, a lot of weeks. I have a big Excel spreadsheet with cells for things like:
- how eyes move
- how mouths move
- how faces look
…it goes on and on. They are all written by other authors, so don’t use them. Treat them as imagination starters. They force you to think about what it was in your character’s face that gave away his lie. Why the horse in the corral looked so agitated. Those types of descriptions that, being in a book, can only be conveyed with words.
I’ll start with dogs (if you read my blog on Michael Vick, you won’t be surprised this is where I’d start):
- The dog snorted happily and bounded forward
- The dog curled into a wet lump and lay shivering on the ground
- Dog was doing impression of a corpse
- He stretched, shook himself and circled several times before dropping to the ground
- With pricked ears, he watched for a moment and then yawned
- Roaming the backyard, engaged in dog intrigue
- Dog’s eyes wide, ears flat, a vibrating growl deep in his chest
- Exulting in whatever it is that dogs exult in
- dogs wandered off to rest their noses in their paws
- roughed them up the way Labs expect to be treated
- paws up, aerial
- The dog was sprawled across her lap, his sides rising and falling, his nose mashed against the ground in a most uncomfortable-looking manner. Dogs were funny. They could sleep in peculiar positions.
- Dogs, after voiding their excrement, often make with all four feet a few scratches backwards, even on a bare stone pavement, Wolves and jackals behave in the same manner, yet, as I am assured by the keepers, neither wolves, jackals, nor foxes, when they have the means of doing so, ever cover up their excrement, any more than do dogs. All these animals, however, bury superfluous food.
- Dogs and jackals take much pleasure in rolling and rubbing their necks and backs on carrion. The odor seems delightful to them. wolves don’t roll in the odor
- Dogs scratch themselves with one of their hind-feet; and when their backs are rubbed, they rapidly scratch the air or the ground in a useless and ludicrous manner. by licking the air as if it were a hand.
- As he prepares to spring with a savage growl, canine teeth are uncovered, and the ears pressed close backwards on the head
- flopped onto the floor in a full doggy snit
- happy woofing sounds of a dog discovering hidden treasures
- wag its tale and watch with hopeful eyes
- dog watched him, ears up, head slightly cocked
- dogs, when intently watching and slowly approaching prey, keep one of their fore-legs doubled up for a long time, ready for the next cautious step. they behave in exactly the same manner whenever their attention is aroused. I have seen a dog at the foot of a high wall, listening attentively to a sound on the opposite side, with one leg doubled up
- the one which first sees the other, lowers its bead, crouches a little, or even lies down; takes the proper attitude for concealing himself
- When a dog approaches a strange dog or man in a savage or hostile frame of mind he walks upright and stiffly; his head slightly raised; tail held erect and rigid; the hairs bristle, especially along the neck and back; the pricked ears are directed forwards, and the eyes have a fixed stare
- trotting gravely with high steps, head much raised, moderately erected ears, and tail carried aloft but not stiffly
- young dogs in play growling and biting each other’s faces and legs
- The dog got worried, crawled up on the bed, raced around chasing a ball, finally chased it out of the room. From her roommates room, she heard her barking, growling at the dog, slapping and playing, tossing the ball and the dog returned. She wondered who thought who was whose pack.
Who could not love a dog?
Jacqui Murray is the author of the popular Building a Midshipman, the story of her daughter’s journey from high school to United States Naval Academy. She is webmaster for six blogs, an Amazon Vine Voice book reviewer, a columnist for Examiner.com and TeachHUB, Editorial Review Board member for Journal for Computing Teachers, Cisco guest blog,Technology in Education featured blogger, IMS tech expert, and a bi-weekly contributor to Today’s Author. In her free time, she is the editor of a K-8 technology curriculum, K-8 keyboard curriculum, K-8 Digital Citizenship curriculum, and creator of technology training books for how to integrate technology in education. Currently, she’s editing a thriller that should be out to publishers next summer. Contact Jacqui at her writing office or her tech lab, Ask a Tech Teacher.
Jacqui Murray is the author of the popular Building a Midshipman, the story of her daughter’s journey from high school to United States Naval Academy, and the thriller, To Hunt a Sub. She is also the author/editor of over a hundred books on integrating tech into education, adjunct professor of technology in education, webmaster for four blogs, an Amazon Vine Voice book reviewer, a columnist for TeachHUB, monthly contributor to Today’s Author and a freelance journalist on tech ed topics. You can find her books at her publisher’s website, Structured Learning. The sequel to To Hunt a Sub, Twenty-four Days, will be out this summer. Jacqui Murray has been teaching K-8 technology for 15 years. She is the editor/author of over a hundred tech ed resources including a K-8 technology curriculum, K-8 keyboard curriculum, K-8 Digital Citizenship curriculum. She is an adjunct professor in tech ed, CSG Master Teacher, webmaster for four blogs, an Amazon Vine Voice book reviewer, Editorial Review Board member for Journal for Computing Teachers, CAEP reviewer, CSTA presentation reviewer, freelance journalist on tech ed topics, and a weekly contributor to TeachHUB. You can find her resources at Structured Learning.